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Past Issues
UNDERSTANDING CHILDREN AND THEIR TEMPERAMENTS (PART V)
Pastor Amos Owoseni
THE CHOLERIC CHILD
SOCIAL LIFE
The Choleric child makes a good leader and organizer outside the home. He is an effective person at school or a leader of any group. He disciplines others and is often feared and respected. He discharges his duties well and puts everyone to work. His unsympathetic attitude and bossy nature makes him anti-social. He may be admired by the authorities but certainly will not be a friend to the students. He is usually not a friendly person. He runs shod over others to get the best or achieve his aim.
The Choleric is an opportunist who takes advantage of others to achieve his aim. The child is a bully at school and among his friends. He subjects everyone to his whims and caprices. He is likely to be the one who bullies fresh students and seizes their provisions or other possessions. He enjoys tyrannizing younger people. He influences other children for good or evil, depending on his character. He is usually the crusader for strikes in establishments or disturbances in schools. He challenges teachers or openly defies authority.
The Choleric child must be trained to respect God, authority and the feelings of others. Choleric children do not normally succumb to peer pressure; but if they do, they cause heartaches. However, if they are trained, fear God and are sympathetic towards others, they make good encourager.
Whenever they lead, there are a lot of achievements but if they are wayward, they bring a lot of trouble, not only to their families but also to neighbors and school authorities.
The Choleric child is the type with which no parent wants his child to associate.
FUTURE MARIAGE
The Choleric child needs a lot of Christian counseling before entering into marriage. This child makes an industrious and productive marriage partner; but he is emotionally deficient and is hard to please. Such a child works hard to make his environment enviable and comfortable. He will be the last to neglect his marital obligations. He provides adequately for his family by engaging in many financial ventures or going for a vocation that would give him a good financial standing.
Unless controlled by the Holy Spirit, the Choleric subject their families to humiliation and many heartaches by their hostility and lack of flexibility. Their children fear them; their spouses feel proud of them though they fear to share themselves with them. In an extreme case, there is no friendship between them and their spouses or children. When daddy or mommy comes home, all the children rum to hide for the fear of being scorned either for doing something or not doing something.
Wives of some Choleric husbands dare not go out without their husbands’ permission. They have no right to allow friends, relatives or others in their homes. Some Choleric husbands forbid their wives to go to Church.
The Choleric person’s emotional life is the least developed area of his personality. Love is hard for Choleric to demonstrate. They find it hard to show open affection. It is not in their nature but they can learn.
The Choleric child must be taught to have regard for others’ views to respect their feelings. Parents must learn to show them affection and compassion in order to prepare them to be loving and kind spouses and parents in the future. The girls must be taught to be courteous and to respect men for their future happiness. It is an asset if a girl has a good relationship with her father and she sees her mother respects him. The Choleric boy must be taught early to be courteous to girls, talk to them politely, offer a helping hand, offer a chair, and open a door and not to despise suggestions or contributions from a woman. Let the boys know that women are not second-class citizens; women have a lot to offer in marriages and they should be made thinking partners.
The role of submission is harder for Choleric wife than the other temperaments. The Choleric girl form an affluent home or with a high academic standard will find it hard to submit to her husband, if she is not trained early. She must be taught early that God demands wives to respect to their husbands even if a woman is the head of state. Good training backed by prayers is important or the Choleric girl will find the role of a wife very difficult. For example, it would be hard for her to respect or give in to a slow and unmotivated Phlegmatic or a shy, fearful and indecisive Melancholy or a clownish and carefree Sanguine.
If she marries a hard Choleric like herself, they will turn their home into a boxing ring. There will be no peace, as both of them will be fighting to be the head of the home. Since a man will always be a man, the Choleric will either be emotionally crushed, or will divorce.
The Holy Spirit is able to mellow both Choleric and turn their home into a harmonious and productive outfit. They need to be guided and taught to rely on the Holy Spirit by praying always. For with God, all things are possible.
TO BE CONTINUED
Contact Pastor Amos Owoseni at Greater Tomorrow Bible Church
(773) 784-9751
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